


We Shine Bright (I’m Alive)

by blandbanana



Series: Kun-centrics Because Kun is Best Boi [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten is Whipped, Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten is a Good Friend, Cuddles, M/M, Protective Lee Taeyong, Protective Suh Youngho | Johnny, Qian Kun-centric, Sick Qian Kun, Slowish burn?, also we need more kun-centric stuff and i am your supplier, idk man it started out as a drabble and-, kun best boy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-30
Updated: 2020-10-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:55:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27277597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blandbanana/pseuds/blandbanana
Summary: “We’re worried about you.” Taeyong started, opening his mouth to continue, but Kun cut him off.“You have no reason to be. I’m fine. See,” he smiled, showing off his small dimples and gesturing at his body, straightening his posture, “perfectly healthy.”Taeyong’s mouth was open, probably from the shock of Kun’s interjection, more defensive than the younger boy meant it to be.Ten cut in softly, no sarcasm in his tone, “You’re stretched thin. Being a leader is really hard, and we can all see the effect it has on you. This isn’t supposed to be an attack, just a slight intervention from the hyungs to set you back on track.”aka the first of many kun-centric fics from me because the drought is real
Relationships: Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten/Qian Kun, Lee Taeyong/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Series: Kun-centrics Because Kun is Best Boi [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1991662
Comments: 16
Kudos: 223





	We Shine Bright (I’m Alive)

**Author's Note:**

> supp!! so this has been sitting in my notes for a few weeks because i was too lazy to anything with it but it is finally here. update to come soon for my other fic, too, it’s in the works. it’ll be a good one, promise! anygay, onwards, friends!

The moment Kun’s eyes opened, he knew today was going to be bad. 

Don’t get him wrong, he was an optimistic person- he would never go into a situation with a bad attitude. Intentionally, at least. _Except today._

Arisen from his restless sleep by screaming and loud, fast footsteps, he secretly wished he could just sleep through today and leave the little demons- _no, members-_ to fend for themselves. He was almost back to sleep when a louder, more shrill and definitely more concerning “KUN-MA!” pushed him out of his bed and into the living room at, what could only be described as “NCT leader speed”. He and Taeyong shared it, along with the very tempting urge to go to sleep and abandon their problematic gremlins. 

Once Kun was in the living room, all chaos broke. Yangyang yelling, eyes wide as saucers and voice shrill as a witch- much like the ones from the movie Ten and Mark had made them watch as soon as the clock hit 12:00 on October 1st (with subtitles, of course.) Kun could see the comparison of the three witches to the three members standing before him, Yangyang shrilly yelling as if he was in charge, Lucas following the maknae’s lead blindly, and Hendery sitting behind the two dumbfounded, repeating words he heard quietly. The three were all glaring at Xiaojun, though, who looked quite murderous and while Kun knew he should stop them all from _probably killing each other,_ he was still only half-awake and his fuzzy, sleep deprived brain couldn’t care less. 

“GE!” He heard Yangyang snap pointedly, eyes accusing. Really, no one seemed to care Kun was only in his boxers, hair sticking up in all directions, eyes barely open. Kun sighed heavily, rubbing at his forehead, an oncoming headache already forming. 

“What, Yang?” He asked groggily, deadpanning at the maknae. 

“See! You weren’t even listening, this whole time! Really helpful, ge.” The youngest pouted, dividing his glare between Xiaojun and Kun. 

Before Kun could open his mouth to scold the younger boy for his manners, the one person Kun could rely on in the godforsaken family walked through the door with a shout of “I’M HOME!” 

Kun gave Yangyang a look meant to imply “better be glad, kid”, but he wasn’t sure if it came across as well as he had hoped through his groggy state. 

Ten waltzed through the hallway, clutching at around five bags of breakfast, and Kun thanked god that Ten had gone to get them food- because if Kun had to cook this morning, the members would have been getting burnt toast. 

Ten set the bags on the dining room table, with a sly remark, “Go on, children, get it while you can.” Yangyang and Xiaojun pounced on the food, all traces of anger from whatever _in gods name_ they were fighting about before Kun got to them. 

Lucas and Hendery soon followed, Winwin probably still asleep, and Ten made his way over to Kun amidst the chaos. 

His quiet, “Kunnie?” broke the oldest boy from his tired trance, and Ten seemed to understand immediately. He pushed the older boy towards their now shared room (Yangyang and Xiaojun had gotten fed up with his motherly-ness pretty quickly, but Kun wasn’t complaining). 

“Go, Kun. Get some more rest, I’ll make sure they don’t eat all the food so you’ll have some when you wake up.” The Thai boy asserted, no room in his tone for argument. Not that Kun was awake enough, nor had the energy to do so. He simply nodded, before stumbling back to bed, falling into the soft mattress and falling asleep almost instantly. 

-

When he awoke for the second time, the light streaming from the curtains was golden, and no longer bright enough to cause a headache. Kun laid still and soundlessly, enjoying the silence. The laziness he felt was as rare as striking gold, as it was one of there very few days off, something he had not registered this morning and cause a split second of panic. 

When he finally convinced himself to get up, he realized there was no one at the dorm. It explained the silence, at least. NCT members weren’t exactly known for their ability to stay quiet- something Kun despised, but ultimately adored. 

He made his way to the kitchen, opening up the refrigerator door, only to find a note attached to plastic tupperware, reading _“This is your share of food from this morning- be grateful and eat it all. I almost lost a tooth trying to save it for you. -Ten <3” _

He smiled endearingly, chuckling at the sentiment. Ten’s sarcasm was unrivaled, even from the most witty and ‘savage’ members. While some members found it annoying, (playfully, of course, they all... _mostly_ loved each other), Kun found it cute. But maybe he was biased. Whatever. 

He took the container carefully, heating it up and placing it on a paper plate mindlessly. His thoughts were elsewhere, on the constriction in his throat, the rumbling of his stomach, and the slight pounding in the back of his head. He couldn’t be sick, could he? 

As he ate, he noted the flimsiness of his stomach. How everything felt so fragile there, one wrong move, and he’d be out of practice for a few days to rest. And while he would definitely appreciate the extra sleep, he had responsibilities- his songs, his group- and he had to keep himself on his toes. 

Kun placed those thoughts in the back of his head, throwing his plate away and locating his cellphone to text Ten, ask where they were, ask if he needed to get started on dinner. He wouldn’t let the members eat takeout twice in a day- they were idols, after all. 

He scrolled through his notifications lazily, until a text message from Johnny caught his eye. It was strange, getting texts from members outside of WayV, Chenle, Renjun, and the occasional Taeyong message. He clicked on Johnny’s name wearily, scanning over the message with faint concern. 

_**Johnny Hyung** _  
_ > Hey, Kun. Taeyong wants to talk to you, can you come to the 127 dorm sometime today? Just let me know. Ten will be here, too, so you’re more comfortable. _

Kun was confused- if Taeyong needed him, why didn’t he text him himself? And why didn’t Ten tell him? Did he do something wrong? 

He opted to not think about it too much, as he felt his anxiety rise, and typed out a simple reply telling the older member he was on his way. 

He grabbed the keys to the company van, locking the door behind him, trying to ignore the anxious thoughts telling him that something was off. 

-

The door opened, and while Kun had expected to see Johnny, instead Taeil welcomed him inside, instructing him to take his shoes off and side-hugging him gently. Kun’s confusion must have been apparent, from Taeil’s understanding expression, and the younger boy tried to quell his fear. 

He was lead into the small kitchen, and the three boys he had expected to see were sitting around the table, like some kind of intervention. Kun sat down gently, Taeil joining him at his side, and Taeyong cleared his throat gently to grab everyone’s attention. 

“We’re worried about you.” Taeyong started, opening his mouth to continue, but Kun cut him off. 

“You have no reason to be. I’m fine. See,” he smiled, showing off his small dimples and gesturing at his body, straightening his posture, “perfectly healthy.” 

Taeyong’s mouth was open, probably from the shock of Kun’s interjection, more defensive than the younger boy meant it to be. 

Ten cut in softly, no sarcasm in his tone, “You’re stretched thin. Being a leader is really hard, and we can all see the effect it has on you. This isn’t supposed to be an attack, just a slight intervention from the hyungs to set you back on track.” 

Kun’s mouth went wide, eyes traveling quickly between Taeil, Ten, Johnny, and Taeyong, unable to process. _He_ was supposed to be a hyung that intervened and helped straighten out the younger kids- this wasn’t supposed to happen to him. 

Johnny sighed, breaking his silence. “This isn’t to belittle you, but everyone needs some help sometimes. We know you probably won’t let the younger ones help you out, and that’s understandable, but this is what we are here for. As your hyungs.” 

Kun felt a strange warmth bloom in his chest at those words, despite feeling a little embarrassed. He had never been treated like one of the younger members- normally he was the one coddling and protecting them, he had never experienced that before. 

Taeyong smiled at him. “Exactly. We just are stepping in to help you.” 

Kun narrowed his eyes a little, still weary. “How exactly are you ‘stepping in’, hyung?” 

Ten grabbed his hand gently, and he heard Taeil sigh. “You haven’t been eating very well. You do eat- just not a lot, you seem to be too focused on making sure your members are. So Ten, or whoever in this room is there with you at the moment will make sure you eat.” The oldest said, rubbing Kun’s back. 

Taeyong nodded. “And making sure you get enough sleep. You do a lot for WayV, song wise, promotion wise- you need to start getting some rest. Ten will make sure you get to bed before 2, at the very least.” 

This was a rule Kun wasn’t foreign to, Mark has the same restrictions when it came to spending too much time at the studio- so at least he wasn’t alone. It was still a bit humiliating, though. 

Johnny sighed quietly at the resigned look on Kun’s face, getting up and taking him into a hug. “We aren’t mad, or trying to treat you like a kid. We are just trying to look out for you. Like you do for everyone else.” 

-

Ten stayed quiet on the ride home, leaving Kun to his thoughts. He watched as they passed by the lights of the city, the sky dark and little hints of stars shining through the thick clouds. 

He wondered if his members knew. If they saw that he wasn’t taking care of himself. His sniffled, his runny nose becoming apparent to him, and he cursed it. He should’ve realized how obvious he’d been- he hadn’t wanted the members to worry. 

Ten caught his eye in the rear view mirrors from the front seat, taking out one of his earbuds and looking back at Kun. He held out his hand, a gentle, simple gesture that never failed to make Kun’s heart soar. (For normal, heterosexual reasons, of course.) 

The ride back was silent once more, and Kun’s thoughts quieted as he listened to the lull of the music playing on Ten’s abandoned earbud, and fell asleep. 

-

The next morning wasn’t awkward, nor showed any signs that the members knew of the new situation Kun was in. The day started off normally, (about as normally as you could get in an NCT subunit’s dorm), and Kun felt relieved, even if he could feel Ten’s quiet gaze on him throughout breakfast. 

He quickly forgot it, though, as they arrived at dance practice, adrenaline high and smiles on their faces as his members goofed around. He made sure they each had water, and a snack- _just in case,_ and found Ten doing the same for him. It was new, but not entirely unwelcome, either. It made Kun smile- and Ten smiled back. 

The endorphins slowly wore off, though, as the dance practice was extended, and the members started to sweat, struggling to catch their breath between the four and fifth times rehearsing Turn Back Time. They were to perform it for their NCT 2020 showcase, along with the big group number, which was kicking all of them to their breaking point. 

Kun called for a break, as a good leader should, he told himself, and promptly collapsed onto Ten’s shoulder, the younger wrapping his arm around Kun’s waist and pulling him into his frame. He meant to thank him, but through his pants the words were lost, the older boy gulping water. 

When the choreographer ended their break, bringing them all back to practice, Kun felt lightheaded, and it didn’t go unnoticed by Ten, who’s gaze pierced his back for the next hour of their practice. Eventually, Kun’s stumbles became enough, and Ten pulled the choreographer aside to end the practice. Kun shot him a grateful, yet embarrassed look, and Ten took his hand, leading him and the rest of the members to the van. 

-

It went on for weeks- Ten looking out for Kun when the hyungs weren’t there. Dragging him extra snacks, dragging him from his studio when the clock hit 2:00 am, ending practice early and cuddling him until he was sure Kun was truly asleep. 

Kun would be lying if he said it didn’t make him feel loved, the gentle glances and softness coming from his best friend. It was a side of Ten that the younger boy rarely showed on camera, meant for the members and the members only. The late night smoothies with his “baby Yangyang”, watching a movie Hendery had been dying to watch and ordering the boy’s favorite food, the one his mama used to make. The nights when Xiaojun couldn’t sleep, too scared of what was to come, and Ten would take him to into his arms, singing an old, Chinese lullaby, that left Kun wondering how he even knew it. When Lucas would get stressed, losing his trademark smile, and Ten would sit with him until the anxiety faded away. When Winwin would miss Yuta, away in China for promotions, and the Thai would watch an animated movie with him, the one in Japanese, that always reminded Winwin of his lover. 

It was the side of Ten that made his heart melt. (Rather than the other side of him- that made Kun’s heart _pound-_ but he’d rather not talk about that.)

To be on the receiving end of it wasn’t new, but it was becoming more normal- which made Kun feel special. It was one of Ten’s many charms- the ability to make anyone feel special. 

Kun smiled, as he looked up at the Thai boy, who was sleeping, with the oldest Chinese member laying in his lap. He kissed Ten’s hand lightly, before closing his eyes, and sleeping soundly. 

-

Kun sighed, all alone in the van, headed to a vlive for NCT 2020. The other members had left early, Ten letting him sleep a little longer than the others, which was shockingly not protested by the younger members. Maybe they did know, after all. 

He felt loved. He felt cared for. It was nice, to have someone looking out for him. He shot Ten a quick thank you text, before he forgot, and stepped out of the van as his manager parked and waved goodbye. As soon as he stepped into the building, he was whisked away by hairdressers and the makeup noonas, all chastising him endearingly for his sleep-induced puffy face. He smiled at them, chuckling as they fixed his hair and pushed him off to get settled with the other members. 

Johnny saw him first, the expression on his face making Kun feel nothing less of adored, and the older boy patted the seat beside him. 

“You’re beside me today, Kunny Kunny Kun. Hope that’s okay with you!” Johnny pinched his cheek and Kun felt his face redden, but smiled at the older nonetheless. 

He caught Ten’s eye, who looked nothing short of fabulous, his outfit fitting him perfectly. Kun made a mental note to thank his stylist- and Johnny pinched his side lightly. Kun turned to see a smug look on his hyung’s face, before the older leaned in, whispering, “You should go tell him.” 

Kun’s eyes went wide, asking pointedly, “Tell him what, hyung?” 

And at that, Johnny just smiled, and the conversation ended, their camera director notifying them that the live would start soon.

-

The live was a success- the staff all taking their breaks- leaving the members to talk amongst themselves. Taeyong and Taeil migrated towards him and Johnny, asking about his health, Taeyong bringing a hand up to Kun’s forehead when he noticed his red face. 

“You’re not sick, are you? I thought you were abiding by our agreement, huh?” Taeyong asked sternly, and Kun suddenly felt very bad for the younger members, to whom he had scolded the same way many times. It was not fun to be on the recieving end of it. 

“Yes, hyung, I am- I’m just a bit flushed.” Kun stuttered, feeling his skin heat up even more- _he didn’t even think that was possible, at this point-_ and snuck a glance at Ten, who was chatting with Shotaro. 

Taeyong’s eyes lit up with understanding, flicking Kun’s forehead with his finger. Kun winced, eyes wide, and Taeil tutted behind him, muttering “God, they make it so obvious.” 

Kun looked between the two confusedly, suddenly feeling like a kid getting scolded by his mom. Johnny laughed- Kun had forgotten he was there- and pulled Kun to his side, saying, “Leave him alone, guys- he doesn’t know yet!”, before whisking him away and depositing him beside Ten. 

Ten paused his speech- something about this great sights of China and Japan- and took Kun’s hand, smiling. Kun’s heart dropped to his stomach- and he was glad nobody noticed. He bit his lip- what was this feeling? And why was it happening so often now? 

-

A month passed quickly. Promotions were a whirlwind, never really ceasing, but they got a week long break before they were off to SM Town 2020, in Beijing. 

A week’s rest had never felt so good. Kun had tried to stay up a few nights to work on some beats he had floating around in his head, but Ten dragged him by his _ear_ like an angry grandma- back to their room and sang him to sleep. 

He found himself doing it once more on purpose- he loved Ten’s attention, and his voice. The soft lull, a mix between Thai, Korean, Chinese, and English never failed to make him feel drowsy. It made his heart pound, just thinking about it.

So when the clock hit 2:00, and Ten came to drag him out of his studio, and he complied willingly. If Ten knew his scheme, he didn’t say anything about it, instead cuddling him softer than before, singing a new tune, comforting and familiar in a way Kun couldn’t place. 

Kun didn’t feel the way Ten would kiss his forehead as he drifted off, or comb his fingers through his hair before tucking him in and turning out the lights. 

-

Kun started to make sense of his feeling towards the Thai boy in the middle of the first night in Beijing. He watched as the younger boy waltzed around the stage with other SM artists, looking as natural as possible, and also looking _very_ sexy, although Kun would never admit it. 

He had never wanted to kiss the boy more. Pull him in, forget the audience, forget the managers. He found himself longing to hug him, kiss him- anything. But why? Wasn’t that a little strange? To think of his didi, his member, like that? He stopped short, shocked at himself, before shaking it off and going to find his other members, tearing his gaze away from Ten. 

-

Later that night, after an exhausting performance, he laid in bed next to a sleeping Jaemin. He could hear the young boy snoring, too far gone from the world to hear if Kun called someone. A certain someone, who he couldn’t stop thinking about- how bad he wanted Ten there with him, how bad he wanted to hear him sing that stupid lullaby. 

Kun pulled his phone off the charger, squinting at the bright light as it hit his face. He scrolled through, opening his contacts, hitting Ten’s name and calling him without hesitation. If he hesitated, he wouldn’t go through with it- and he _needed_ Ten. It was worth the embarrassment. 

The call rang once, but was picked up by a groggy voice, whispering into the speaker- “Hello?” 

“...Ten?” 

He could hear the rustling of the sheets, quietly, of course- as to not wake his roommate, Sungchan- “Kun? Is something wrong?” 

Kun sighed, wincing at the words about to come out of his mouth. “Will you please.. come to my room? I need you to- to sing. Please.” 

He heard Ten sigh in relief. It made his heart swell, that someone was worried for him. 

“Of course, baby, I’ll be right there.” 

The line died then, leaving Kun in the dark, shocked and his cheeks red at the name. ‘Baby’. He wondered what it meant. What it could mean. 

He didn’t have to ponder long, as a soft knock sounded not even a minute later, and Kun rushed to open the door. Ten stopped in, chucking softly as he heard Jaemin’s loud snores. 

“No wonder you need to me to get you to sleep- he’s so loud.” 

Kun laughed, grabbing the other boy’s hand in the dark. 

Ten quieted, using his phone flashlight to lead them to the bed. He pulled Kun beside him, into his arms, and rocked slightly to the soft hum of his voice. Kun could already feel his eyelids drooping, but he looked up at Ten- admiring the view he had. Something only he had. He wondered if it was really as special as he was making it out to be. 

Ten seems to notice, stopping his tune to look down at the older boy. “Something wrong?” 

Kun shook his head, closing his eyes tightly before making up his mind. 

Screw the friendship- he had to see if this was real. 

He surged forward, pressing his lips to Ten’s and pulling away chastely. He immediately regretted it, spewing quiet apologies, trying to wrench free from Ten’s grip. 

But Ten didn’t let go. 

Instead, he cupped Kun’s red cheeks, pulled him closer, and pressed their lips together again. It really was magical, just like all the movies Chenle was obsessed with, the ones with the princesses and the heroes and the happily ever afters. 

Ten pulled away, and through the light from the phone’s flashlight, Kun could see the bright smile sitting on the boy’s face. 

“Will you... y’know... be my boyfriend? I think I really like you. A lot. I can’t stop thinking about you, your voice, and your kindness, and-“ Kun was cut off by a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth. 

“Baby, I thought you’d never ask.” 

-

(Needless to say, he earned another flick on the forehead from Taeyong, once the older heard the story. 

“Oblivious boys.” 

“Hyung, it’s not like you aren’t oblivious too- we all see the way you look at Johnny-hyung.” 

_Thump._

“Ow, hyung!”)

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading, ya hoes- don’t be afraid to leave a comment!


End file.
